Tolstoy, Beethoven, and Why I Write about What I Read

I think I’ve read Tolstoy's “The Kreutzer Sonata” before, but I have only the vaguest memory of the arc of the story. In fact, I’m about halfway through a second reading, and I’m amazed and ashamed at how little it resonates with me at all. I’ve been at it for a few days, and still haven’t gotten to the part of the story that I would have described a week ago if I’d been called upon to describe the story. A week ago, I would have summarized the story by saying that a married man gets jealous when his wife plays Beethoven’s Kreutzer Sonata (a piece for violin and piano) with someone else, and that the man’s jealousy is unfounded.

Tolstoy’s certainly not known for his short stories. The shortest work of his that have significant name recognition is “The Death of Ivan Ilyich”, which is more of a novella than a short story. That said, Tolstoy did write many short stories, especially toward the end of his life, often with a philosophical or religious theme. “The Kreutzer Sonata” is one of those, telling the story of a man who had killed his wife in a fit of jealousy. (This is not a spoiler, by the way. The narrative is a minor part of the story, which is largely composed of a diatribe by the jealous man, as he corners a fellow train traveler to tell him why he thinks there is no such thing as love, and the way that men and women relate to each other is an unnatural sham.)

As the new year begins, this seems like a great example of why I intend to write more about what I read. I often read while distracted, and I don’t take time to reflect on what I’m reading, or on what I’ve read. For example, I’ve read “The Kreutzer Sonata” just in brief fits and starts this time, and I suspect that’s how I read it the first time. I probably was distracted by life, both personal and professional, and just packed in reading a page here or there while standing in line at the airport, or while taking a brief break at work, or for a few minutes before falling asleep in the evening. Currently, I have a good understanding of what I’m reading, but I’ll bet that the story wouldn’t stick with me beyond the next few weeks. In fact, as I look over the books that I read last year, I find that there are some that I barely recall.

If I’m going to be able to take more than the diversion of the moment with me from the books that I’m reading, I should spend time thinking about them, and this blog can serve as an opportunity for me to think about the books that I’m reading. I think of myself as a cultured reader, but if I’m not taking more from the act of reading than a momentary diversion, I might as well be reading James Michener or Tom Clancy.